Yahari Ore no Seishun Rabu Kome wa Machigatteiru - Volume 01 Read online

  “Yeah. Our team is really weak right now, so we have to practice through lunch… We’ve been asking them over and over for permission to use the courts during lunch, and they finally gave us the okay. What are Yuigahama-san and Hikigaya-kun doing here?”

  “Ahh, not much…”

  Yuigahama said that and turned to me, as if to ask for confirmation. Well, I was actually eating lunch, and you were on your way to finish an errand, right? She had the attention span of a bird or something…

  “I see.” That girl, Sai-chan or whatever, gave us a smile.

  “Sai-chan, you play tennis for class and even practice through lunch… That must be really tough.”

  “Yeah, but it’s what I want to do, so it’s fine… Ah, also, Hikigaya-kun, you’re pretty good at tennis.”

  To my surprise, she turned the conversation to me, so of course I fell silent. It was the first time that I'd heard that. Also, who the hell was this person? Why did she know my name?

  “Ohh…?” I wanted to ask her a few things, but before I could, Yuigahama butted in, sounding impressed.

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, his form is really good when he plays.”

  “Ahh, you’re embarrassing me, ha ha ha… (whisper) So, who is this person?”

  I said the last bit soft enough to make sure only Yuigahama could hear me, but Yuigahama smashed my efforts to itty bitty pieces.

  “Hwahhh?! You’re in the same class! You even take gym class together! Why don’t you know?! I can’t believe you!”

  “You idiot, of course I know! I just happened to forget! …And boys and girls don’t take gym class together!

  I was trying to be so considerate, and she completely ruined my efforts… Now everyone in the world would know that I didn’t know this girl’s name. And now she’s probably in a bad mood…

  As I thought that, I glanced in Sai-chan’s direction and saw that her eyes were tearing up… Crap, this was bad. In dog terms, she looked like a Chihuahua, and in cat terms, she looked like a munchkin… That was how cute and sad-looking she was.

  “A-Ahaha. So I guess you really don’t remember my name… I’m Totsuka Saika. We’re in the same class.”

  “A-ah, sorry about that. We changed classes recently, so it’s a bit difficult for me… Haha.”

  “We were in the same class during the first year too… Ehehe, maybe I just don’t have much of a presence…”

  “Nah, that’s not it… Oh, I got it! It’s just that I don’t hang out with the girls in our class very much! You know, I still don’t know the real name of this girl here!”

  “Cut it out and remember!”

  Yuigahama smacked me on the head, but even that caused Totsuka to mutter with a grim look on her face.

  “You sure are good friends with Yuigahama-san…”

  “E-ehh?! W-we’re definitely not! If anything, all I want to do is kill this guy! Kill Hikki and then I’ll die too… That sort of thing!”

  “Yeah, that’s it! …Also, that’s damn scary! You’re damn scary! Lover’s suicide?![5] I don’t want that at all!”

  “Huh?! A-are you a complete idiot?! I didn’t mean it like that at all!”

  “You two really are pretty close…”

  Totsuka said that in a sad tone, and this time faced me.

  “I’m male, by the way… do I really look that frail to you?”

  “Eh?”

  My thoughts and movements completely halted at that moment. I quickly looked to Yuigahama. That’s a lie, right? I asked with my eyes. But Yuigahama, seemingly still angry, her cheeks still flushed red, just gave me a few strong nods.

  Wait… Seriously? That can’t be right. That has to be a joke.

  Totsuka saw my doubtful gaze and turned bright red. Her head lowered, and she stared at me with upturned eyes.

  Totsuka’s hand slowly reached down towards her (his?) shorts. That small movement was already enough to captivate me.

  “…I can show you proof, if you want.”

  I felt something inside of my heart twitch.

  A little devil Hachiman appeared on my right shoulder. ”Ohh, that’s great, you should just go ahead and take a look--you might get really lucky, ya know?” Well, that’s true… This was a pretty rare chance, after all. ”Wait just a second!” Ahh, and now the angel Hachiman has arrived. ”While you’re at it, how about you ask her to take off her top too?” What the hell… What kind of crappy angel was this?

  In the end, I decided to listen to my own common sense.

  Yes, with these kind of androgynous characters, their entire appeal lay in the fact that their gender was so ambiguous! And so, by reaching this logical conclusion, I was able to calm down and proceed with a cool head.

  “In any case… I’m sorry. I really didn’t know, but I apologize if I caused you any discomfort.”

  When Totsuka heard me say that, he shook off the tears that had been building up in his eyes and gave me a smile.

  “Nah, it’s fine.”

  “But, Totsuka… I’m surprised you know my name.”

  “Eh, ahh… Well, Hikigaya-kun stands out a lot in class.”

  After Totsuka said that, Yuigahama stared at me.

  “Reeaaally? But he’s so plain-looking… It’d take quite a lot to notice a guy like him.”

  “You idiot, of course I stand out! I stand out like a bunch of glittering stars in the night sky!”[6]

  “How exactly?”

  Wow, she said that back to me without batting an eyelash.

  “…W-well, when someone sits in the corner of the classroom and talks to himself, doesn’t that make him stand out a bit…?”

  “Ah, that’s what stands-… Ahh, umm… My condolences…”

  Yuigahama looked away from me. That was exactly the type of attitude that made me gloomy, though…

  The atmosphere was getting heavier again, so Totsuka decided to try and save it.

  “But seriously, Hikigaya-kun is pretty good at tennis. Have you played before?”

  “I mean, I played a bit of Mario Tennis during elementary school, but I haven’t played real tennis.”

  “Oh, that’s the one everyone plays together. I played that too, you know. Playing doubles was reaaally fun, wasn’t it~~?”

  “…I’ve only played it by myself.”

  “Eh? ……Ah. Umm, sorry.”

  “What the hell, are you a psychological minesweeper or something? Is it your job to dig up every little bit of trauma I have?”

  “Hikki’s the one who has way too many bombs!”

  Totsuka, standing to the side, seemed to be having fun watching the exchange between me and Yuigahama.

  And like that, the bell that announced the end of lunch break rang.

  “Let’s head back.”

  Totsuka said that, and Yuigahama followed after him.

  I watched them from behind and suddenly felt a bit strange.

  I see… They were in the same class, so it was natural for them to leave together… For some reason I felt moved by that.

  “Hikki? What are you doing?”

  Yuigahama turned back towards me, seeming puzzled. Totsuka also stopped walking and faced me.

  I could go together with them? I was about to ask, but I stopped.

  Instead, I said the following:

  “What happened to that juice you were supposed to buy?”

  “Huh? … Ahhh!!”

  6-4

  A few days later, I was in gym class again.

  Because of my repeated practice sessions with the wall, I had become a master of tennis wall hitting. At this point, I could hold up a rally with the wall without having to move a step in any direction.

  After tomorrow’s class, we would be starting tennis matches for a bit. In other words, today was the last time I would be able to just practice rallying.

  It was my last rally practice, so I thought I would use it to its fullest, but then I felt something poking me on the right shoulder.

  And who mig
ht this fairy behind my back be? There wasn’t anyone who would talk to me, so this had to be some kind of supernatural phenomenon, right?

  I turned around, when I felt a finger poke into my right cheek.

  “Ahah, caught you~.”

  It was Totsuka Saika, giving me a cute smile.

  Oof, what was this I was feeling…? My heart was seriously pounding. If he wasn’t a guy, I would have asked him out and then gotten rejected on the spot. Wow, so I guess I would get rejected here?

  I mean, once you saw Totsuka in his uniform it was plain as day that he was a guy, but when he wore his gym uniform, which was the same for guys and girls, his gender really wasn’t obvious. If his socks were black and went higher than his ankles, you definitely wouldn’t be able to tell.

  His arms, legs, and waist were all slender, and his skin was pale white.

  Well, it was true that he didn’t have very large breasts, but it’s not like Yukinoshita had those either.

  For some reason, I felt a horrible shiver run up my spin.

  So having cooled down, I spoke up to Totsuka, who was standing there still smiling at me.

  “What did you want?”

  “Ah. Today you know, the guy I usually pair up with isn’t at school. So… umm, if you want, wanna be my partner?”

  Stop looking at me with upturned eyes, dammit. You look way too cute like that. Stop blushing, ugh.

  “Ahh, that’s fine. I’m by myself right now too.”

  Sorry, wall. I can’t hang out with you today…

  After I apologized to the wall and responded to Totsuka, he seemed relieved. “Phew, what a relief!” I heard him mutter.

  Dammit, hearing that made me nervous. He was seriously way too cute.

  According to Yuigahama, Because of how cute Totsuka was, some of the girls at school had begun calling him “the Prince.” I see, considering Totsuka was a pretty boy who had a feminine sense of cuteness, that name fit him to a tee. In addition, the name “the Prince” also made you want to protect him.

  With that, my free practice with Totsuka began.

  Totsuka was on the tennis team, so it was no surprise that he was good.

  He got to the superb serve I had mastered in my wall-hitting sessions, and returned the ball right at me.

  After we had repeated those motions over and over, Totsuka even started to strike up a conversation, almost as if he was getting bored.

  “As I thought, Hikigaya-kun is pretty good.”

  Because we were pretty far from each other, Totsuka was speaking pretty slowly.

  “I was super awesome at wall hitting, so that makes me a tennis master.”

  “That’s squash, not tennis…”

  As our slow, drawn-out sentences went back and forth, Totsuka and I continued hitting the ball to each other. The others around us missed shots and missed returns, but we continued our long rally.

  And then, the rally stopped. Totsuka caught the ball in his hands as it bounced towards him.

  “Let’s take a short break.”

  “Alright.”

  We sat down together. Why the hell was he sitting next to me? Wasn’t that a bit weird? When two guys sat together, wasn’t it more normal to sit across from each other or diagonal from each other? Wasn’t he too close? Wasn’t he way too close?

  “Hey, I wanted to ask Hikigaya-kun for some advice…”

  Totsuka spoke with a serious look on his face.

  I see. If he wanted to ask me for advice in secret, then I guess we had to be close like this. That’s why we were sitting so close, wasn’t it?

  “Advice, huh…?”

  “Yeah. It’s about our tennis team actually… we’re really not very good, you know? We don’t have many people either. And if all the third-years graduate by the next tournament, we’ll be in even worse shape. There are a lot of freshmen who joined but who didn’t start playing tennis until high school, so they’re not very used to it yet… and because we’re so weak we can’t get motivated either. I mean, it’s not like people need to compete for spots to play, so…”

  “I see.”

  That made perfect sense. Actually, that seemed like a common problem for the smaller, weaker sports teams.

  Because your team wasn’t very good, people didn’t join. And because there weren’t many people, nobody competed for a spot on the starting lineup.

  Even if you took a break or skipped practice, you could play in the tournament, and as long as you were playing matches, you felt involved enough. There were definitely plenty of people who could be fully satisfied by that even if they didn’t win any matches.

  Those players were never going to get any better. And then, because they didn’t, the team had no hope of attracting new players. And thus continued the vicious cycle.

  “So… if Hikigaya-kun is okay with it, won’t he consider joining the tennis team?”

  “… Huh?”

  Where did that come from…?

  Totsuka saw the confusion in my eyes, and he seemed to shrink into himself as he sat there hugging his knees. He glanced at me once in a while with pleading eyes.

  “Hikigaya-kun is good at tennis, and I think he can get better and better. I think he can motivate the others too. And… if it’s with Hikigaya-kun, I think I can try harder too. U-Umm… I don’t mean that in a weird way or anything! I-It’s just that I want to get stronger at tennis!”

  “It’s fine for you to be weak… I’ll protect you.”

  “… What?”

  “Ah, sorry. My bad.”

  Seeing Totsuka’s lovable innocence made me say the completely wrong thing there, even though I should be trying to be serious here. But come on, he is way too cute. He was so cute that I almost ended up agreeing to join his club on the spot. I almost raised my hand with the vigor of someone charging into battle to get the last piece of cake in the cafeteria.

  But no matter how cute Totsuka may be, there were some requests I just could not grant.

  “… Sorry. I don’t think I can do that…”

  I knew my own personality all too well.

  I didn’t see any point in going to club every day, and also didn’t believe in physical activity every morning. The only people who did that were the old geezers doing tai chi in the park, right? And after all, “I really can’t go on with this~~~…” was pretty much my favorite motto.

  Might have sounded I ripped that off from Korosuke,[1] the Kiteretsu character, but the point is I would definitely end up quitting the team. Even with my first part-time job, I ended up playing hooky three days in.

  If someone like me joined the tennis team, I guarantee that all I would do is get Totsuka depressed.

  “… I see…”

  Totsuka seemed disappointed. Meanwhile, I tried to find something to say in this situation.

  “Well umm… don’t worry. I’ll try to figure something out.”

  Even though I couldn’t do anything.

  “Thanks. I think I feel a bit better after talking with Hikigaya-kun.”

  Totsuka smiled at me, but I knew that his peace of mind was only temporary. At the same time, a part of me also thought that even if it was only temporary, if Totsuka felt at peace, that in and of itself was worthwhile.

  6-5

  “Impossible.”

  That was the first thing Yukinoshita said to me.

  “Impossible, huh… But, umm-“

  “The impossible is impossible.”

  And I was coldly rejected once more.

  This had started when I took Totsuka's words and went to Yukinoshita for advice.

  My plan was to steer the conversation so that I could quit the service club and then publically announce my intention to join the tennis team. Then, little by little, I would fade out of that club as well… But now that plan was being cleanly blocked.

  “I mean, I can see where Totsuka was coming from when he asked me to join the tennis team--in short, I have to scare them into being more active. If a new person joins the club, won
't that eventually change things?”

  “Do you really think you can survive in a group setting like that? Do you think they would readily accept a creature like you?”

  “Uguu…”

  True… I wouldn't exactly be praised for just quitting, but if I saw all those people lazing around during club and enjoying themselves, then I might go and start hitting them with my racquet.