Yahari Ore no Seishun Rabu Kome wa Machigatteiru - Volume 01 Page 10

  As usual, the classroom of Grade 11's Class F was consumed by a grand lunchtime din.

  It was raining, so I found myself without a place to go. I usually had a perfect spot to eat lunch, but I had no interest in getting rained on as I ate.

  And so, left with no other choice, I sat in the classroom and ate my convenience store bread in silence.

  I would have liked to spend this kind of rainy-day lunch break reading a novel or manga or something, but I'd left all the books I was still reading at home. Maybe I should've gone back to get them during the ten minute break…

  But that train had already left the station. I guess the Japanese way to put that would be “ato no matsuri.” In English that would be “after the festival”… No, no, that would be “matsuri no ato”![1]

  Yeah, I was so bored that I was playing both sides of a comedic dialogue by myself.

  Seriously, though… I’ve always thought this, but when you spend a lot of time by yourself, you find that things just kind of happen.

  If you're alone at home, you start talking to yourself more and more. Then you start singing loudly to yourself. And then there are a lot of times when your little sister comes home and you go, “MOTTO! MOTT- Ahh… Hi there.”[2] But I still don’t sing in the classroom.

  And as a result, I often end up thinking about things.

  In a sense, loners are masters of thinking. It's said that man is a frail animal but also a thinking animal, and before you realize it, you'll find yourself thinking about something. And because loners don’t have to spare any thoughts for other people, they can think about things even more deeply. And so, loners like me possess circuitry in our brains that allow us to think differently from normal people, and this sometimes gives us the ability to come up with ideas beyond the capability of normal humans.

  It’s very difficult to try and express the colossal amount of information in the universe through speech alone. It's like a computer. It takes time to upload huge amounts of data to servers or to send it by e-mail. That's the only reason why loners tend to be unskilled at conversation.)

  But I think that this isn’t always a bad thing. Computers don’t exist just for the sake of email--there's the internet and things like Photoshow[3] too. So don’t think that one single point of view is enough to judge a person.

  Well, I pulled out computers as an example there, but it’s not like I’m that knowledgeable when it comes to computers… If you want people who know a lot about computers, then you want the people huddled together at the front of the class.

  Those people were holding PSPs and doing a hunt in Ad-Hoc wireless mode. What were their names again? Oda… or Tahara… Something like that?

  “Hey you, use a hammer or something!”

  “Nah, a gunlance is already way more than I need ^^.”

  They did look like they were having fun… I do play the game they were playing, so if I'm being honest, some part of me wanted to go and join in.

  A long time ago, things like manga, anime, and games were fields dominated by the loners. Lately, though, they had become another way to communicate, and joining in with people like that now required a certain level of communication ability.

  And unfortunately, I seem like a person who half-asses everything, so if I tried to join them they would call me a n00b or a fake when I wasn’t listening. So what the hell should I have done?

  When I was in middle school, I saw some people talking about anime so I tried to join in, but it was clear that they clammed up when they saw me. It was really hard on me… That was when I stopped trying to join that crowd.

  And I’ve never been the kind of guy who tries to get people to include me, so it was even worse. When we played football or baseball as a class, the two most popular boys would do rock paper scissors to decide who would get the first pick. And I was always the last picked, you know? When I look back at my ten-year-old self, when I remember how pitifully nervous I was when they were picking teams… That almost brings me to tears, seriously.

  I wasn’t physically unfit, but that's why I started to become bad at sports. I liked baseball, but I couldn’t find anyone to play it with me… So when I was young, I would always just play off a wall or do fielding practice by myself. I was completely used to playing baseball by myself; I'd pretend there were imaginary people in the field or at bat.

  But there were also people in this class who were good at that kind of communication.

  The people in the back of the class right now, for example.

  There were two people from the soccer team, three boys from the basketball team, and three girls. Just one look at the lively atmosphere surrounding that group was enough to tell you that they were at the top of the class’s social ladder. (By the way, Yuigahama was also part of that group.

  And even within that group, there were two people shining brighter than all the others:

  Hayama Hayato.

  That was the name of the person at the center of that group. He was the soccer team’s ace player, and was a candidate for team captain next semester. He was not a person I enjoyed staring at for extended periods of time.

  In other words, he was a good-looking, faux-stylish guy. Go to hell.

  “Nah, I can’t do it today. I have practice.”

  “Can’t you just spare a day? Double scoops at Baskin Robbins are on sale today~~. I want a chocolate-cocoa double scoop.”

  “Aren’t those both just chocolate? (lol)”

  “Ehhh? No, they’re completely different! Plus, I’m really hungry right now.”

  And the one raising her voice was Hayama’s partner, Miura Yumiko.

  Her blonde hair was styled into ringlets, and if you saw how she wore her school uniform in a completely sloppy way down to her shoulders, you'd think she was proud of it. Was she supposed to be a prostitute or something? And her skirt was so short that there was hardly a point in her wearing it.

  She had nice features and a pretty face, but her stupid behavior and gaudy clothing meant that I didn’t like her very much. Or, rather, I was really just afraid of her. You just never knew what she was going to say to you.

  But (at least from what I’ve seen) Hayama wasn’t afraid of Miura, and in fact thought of her as someone fun to talk to. That's why I really didn’t understand how the kings and queens of the social ladder thought. No matter how you looked at it, that girl was obviously only a "fun person" when she was talking with Hayama. If I talked to her, then she would kill me with a single glance.

  Well, that said, we didn’t really ever have a reason to talk with each other, so it was fine.

  Meanwhile, Hayama and Miura were still joking around with each other.

  “Sorry, but I’m gonna pass for today.”

  Hayama said that; he seemed to have regrouped. Miura looked at him blankly. And then Hayama made a declaration with a super full-fledged smile across his face:

  “This year we’re aiming for the Kokuritsu, after all!”

  Huh? Kokuritsu, not Kunitachi? So he wasn’t talking about Kunitachi, the part of Tokyo that you could reach by the Chuuou line, but rather Kokuritsu? As in, the national tournament?

  “Bwaha…”

  I could feel a laugh welling up inside of me. Seeing him act all proud like that, pretending like he said something cool, was seriously just… just… I couldn’t take it anymore. It was just so awful.

  “But, still, Yumiko. If you eat too much then you’re gonna regret it.”

  “Ya know, I never get fat no matter how much I eat. Ahh, I guess I’ll have to go and eat lots today too. Right, Yui?”

  “Ahh, yeah, Yumiko sure has really good style… But I have plans right now, so I have to--”

  “I know, right? Today I’m going to have to go eat tons and tons!”

  When Miura said that, laughter erupted around her. It sounded empty, like the kind you'd hear added to a comedy show. The laughs were loud and not much else; I could almost see a caption bar attached to the bottom of the screen.


  I wasn't trying to listen to their conversation or anything, but they were being so loud that their voices easily reached my ears. Now that you mention it, otaku or riajuu[4] that got into a group always got really loud. I was sitting still in the center of the room with nobody around me, but everyone was being so loud… It was like I was in the eye of a hurricane.

  Hayama smiled brightly. That smile made it clear that he was the center of attention, beloved by all.

  “Just warning ya: don’t eat so much that your stomach explodes.”

  “Like. I. Said. No matter how much I eat, I’m fine! I don’t get fat. Right, Yui?”

  “Ahhh, Yumiko really just has amazing style. And her legs are so pretty. But seriously, I have to…”

  “Ehh, really? But that Yukinoshita girl has crazy legs too, right?”

  “Ah, that’s true. Yukinon’s legs are pretty crazy…”

  “……”

  “…Ah, but, I mean, Yumiko definitely stands out a lot more!”[5]

  When Miura furrowed her brow, Yuigahama quickly tried to save herself. What the hell… It was like watching a queen and her maid. Still, it didn’t seem like Yuigahama’s follow-up was enough to restore her queen’s mood. Miura’s eyes narrowed--she did not look pleased.

  “Well, actually, I think it’s fine after all… If it’s after practice, I can go with you.”

  Hayama might have sensed the tense atmosphere, because he lightly stepped in.

  The queen seemed to brighten up, smiling. “Okay then, just email me when you’re free!”

  Yuigahama smoothed down her chest in furtive relief.

  Geez, that looked really painful… Were we back in the damn Middle Ages or something? If a good social life required that much effort, then I’d prefer to be alone any day, thank you very much.

  And then Yuigahama and I made eye contact. She looked at me, then seemed to make up her mind about something. She took a deep breath.

  “Umm, I… have to go somewhere for lunch, so…”

  “Oh, really? Then make sure you buy some of that stuff when you get back--you know, that lemon tea? I totally forgot to bring something to drink today. And plus, I’m having bread, so it’s gonna be really rough if I don't have any tea, right?”

  “A-Ah, b-but I might not get back until fifth period, so lunch might have ended, and, umm… y'know…”

  When Yuigahama said that, Miura’s face hardened in an instant.

  Miura looked like she had just gotten bitten by one of her pets. Yuigahama had probably never talked back to Miura before, and yet, on today of all days, she wasn’t doing what Miura wanted her to.

  “Huh? Wait, wait, what’s going on? You know, Yui, haven’t you been staying late after school a lot nowadays? Is it just me, or are you not hanging out with us that much these days?”

  “Ah, well, you know, umm, there’s just some things I’m dealing with, and, umm, it’s just some personal stuff, and I’m really very sorry, but, umm…”

  Yuigahama was completely flustered, but she tried to respond. What the hell… Was she some office worker getting grilled by her boss or something?

  However, Yuigahama’s response seemed to have the opposite effect. Miura began to tap her nails on her desk, seeming irritated.

  Their queen's sudden explosion silenced the class. Even Oda and Tahara (or whatever their names were) really dropped the volumes on their PSPs. Hayama and the group's assorted tagalongs all dropped their gazes awkwardly to the floor.

  The only sound that echoed through the room was the sound of Miura’s nails tapping on her desk.

  “Well, then how should I know what’s going on? If you want to say something, then just go ahead. We’re friends, aren’t we? Hiding things from friends, you know… That’s not good, is it?”

  Yuigahama quickly looked down at the floor.

  At first, Miura’s words sounded just and proper. In fact, her words only seemed to reinforce the friendship between her and Yuigahama.

  They were friends, companions, so they could share everything with each other--that's what Miura was saying. But her words carried another implication: “And if you can’t share with me, then we’re not friends. In fact, we're enemies.” It was the Spanish Inquisition all over again.

  “I’m sorry…”

  Yuigahama timidly apologized; she was still looking at the floor.

  “No no no, that’s not what I want to hear. There’s something you want to say to me, isn’t there?”

  There wasn’t in a person in the world who could actually say something when faced with that. Miura wasn’t trying to make conversation, and Miura wasn’t asking a question. She just wanted to make Yuigahama apologize so she could attack her.

  It was so stupid… If you want to kill each other like that, at least do it in private.

  I turned forward again. Then I began to eat my bread while I fiddled with my phone. I chewed for a bit and took a gulp of my drink. But for some reason… something felt stuck in my throat, and it wasn’t the bread.

  …Why was that, exactly?

  Meals are supposed to be times of good cheer. It's like the guy in The Lonely Gourmet.[6]

  Don’t get me wrong: I didn’t want to help that girl in the slightest. It’s just that when a girl you know is close to tears right in front of you, it just makes your stomach churn; your appetite goes to hell. And I really just wanted to enjoy my meal…

  Plus, getting attacked like that was my thing. I wouldn’t just hand my character trait over to someone else so easily.

  Ah, and there was one more thing:

  …I just really didn’t like that bitch.

  My desk rattled as I gallantly rose from my chair.

  “Hey, just-“

  “Shut the hell up.”

  Cut it out. That's what I wanted to say, but before I had the chance, Miura sent a demonic glare my way.

  “……J-just when is this rain going to stop? I-I sure wish I had brought an umbrella, hahaha…”

  Jesus! Was she some kind of anaconda or something?! I really just wanted to apologize then and there!

  I sank, dejected, into my chair. Miura seemed to have forgotten about my existence; she just looked down on Yuigahama's beaten-down figure.

  “You know, I’m saying this for Yui’s sake, but… That wishy-washy attitude of yours really gets on my nerves.”

  She started by saying it was for Yuigahama’s sake, but finished with how Miura felt about it. She contradicted herself in just one single sentence. But Miura didn’t think it was a contradiction--she was the queen of the group, and in that kind of Feudal society, the leader had absolute power.

  “…Sorry.”

  “That again?”

  Miura's high-handed hmph carried a mix of anger and resignation. That sound alone made Yuigahama shrink down even more.

  Just cut that crap out already, geez… Be more considerate of the people around who have to watch it happen. I can’t stand this oppressive atmosphere… Stop dragging the audience into the youthful drama you people are acting out.

  I once again mustered the small amount of courage I had. I mean, it’s not like they could hate me more… I could head into this battle without any risk, so it wasn’t too bad of a situation for me.

  As soon as I stood up to face the back of the class, Yuigahama looked at me with tear-stricken eyes. And, almost as if she was waiting for that exact moment, Miura spoke in a cold voice:

  “Hey, Yui, where are you looking? You know, you’ve just been apologizing for a while…”

  -

  “She’s not the one you should be apologizing to, Yuigahama-san.”

  -

  The voice that echoed through the room was even icier, even crueler, than Miura’s voice had been. Everyone who heard it cowered. That voice blew like a fierce wind from the North Pole, but that voice was also just as beautiful as an aurora.

  She stood in the corner of the classroom, in front of the door, and yet she drew everyone's gaze immediately, as if she was the ce
nter of the entire world.

  Of all the people on this planet, only Yukinoshita Yukino could sound like that.

  I was suddenly paralyzed, and found myself completely stuck in my half-standing position. Compared to that, Miura’s last attempts at intimidation seemed like child’s play. After all, when Yukinoshita was your opponent, you didn’t even have a chance to be afraid. It was something that went so far beyond fear that you were left with only an impression of beauty.